different...

Looks different here, eh? I am different so the blog has to look different. The picture in the header is really me at about 4 years old. I still stick my lip out at 40. I guess it's genetic. I really did get bubblegum in my hair shortly after that photograph was taken and had to get all my hair cut off. It immediately turned brown, went straight and stayed that way.

My heart goes out to all of you guys who have lost your parents, especially at a young age; especially in an unexpected tragedy. I do have a much deeper sense of compassion for people who have lost loved ones.

Grief takes a VERY long time and seems like a wound that couldn't possibly heal. There is no "getting over it." There's only managing it a bit better as time marches on. Two months seems only like two days since it happened, although I don't burst into tears in public anymore. There are times it aches as if I were sitting in that little folding chair listening to the honor guard firing their guns or reading my goodbye letter to Daddy at his casket then placing it inside his suit jacket. Sometimes it grabs me so hard I gasp out of the blue or just zone out for long periods of time.

I will see him again, but the separation until then is so hard to endure.

Shit. I was going to post a non-traumatic entry. I'll try to make good by the end of the day.

Thanks for sharing your stories, your hearts, your tears.