Pepper and her mama...

She loves to tuck her head under my chin while I rub her sides...

Pepper

Peanut meditating...

Peanut demonstrates child pose kitty-style

Once again...

I am wondering what in the hell is going on with this blog. It needs to transform somehow because I have somehow transformed. Being a therapist means you can't talk about work, though I suppose I can talk about issues. But I do that all day. All day.

I think I have temporarily lost my sense of humor--excised--the removal of a humor tumor. The wound hasn't healed and my comic equilibrium is still face-down on the floor--drunk with reality and change. And ridiculous analogies. Desperate attempts to regrow the humor tumor.

I'm bored.

Maybe I won't be bored later.

But it's true that I might be.

I guess I'll deal with it then.

Atty

Atticus hanging out with mama today...he's been pulling out his fur since Rooney died, but it's getting better.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Petey is enjoying this beautiful weather...it's been so hot and humid lately, but today was in the mid 80's with low humidity...ahhhhhhhh. Pepper is running around so much I can't get a good picture of her! I can always count on the hound to hang out for a photo-op.

Too hot

Smidget says it's too hot! Sheesh!

over-the-shoulder-beagle-holder...

I took this picture by holding my phone over my shoulder. Petey is such a mess! He was running upthe stairs this morning with a cat poo in his mouth. He smells like Fritos too...guess it's bathtime...

not a good way to end the day...

I have to pull myself together to get through the work day. I have to put my little Rooney to sleep this afternoon. He is very sick and there's nothing the vet can do for him. I will miss him so much! He is an awesome cat...the personality of 20 cats in 1.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Yuki and I are being very lazy today...

Happy 4th

Hope you are having a good one!

hang time

Atticus is just hanging with his mama...

slight differences

I don't know if you can spot the subtle differences in these shoes, but one of them has been treated with a specialized dog slobber treatment. It was applied overnight so as to not interrupt our sleep schedule. Gosh, our dogs are just so thoughtful!!!

Well, thank God...

1 As a 1930s wife, I am Very Poor (Failure) Take the test!

HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY!

Ahhhh, SPRING!!

this hat story...

is especially worth reading. Dooce is funnier than usual. I don't have much time to read Dooce or other blogs anymore, but seeing as how I'm saddled with both laryngitis and bronchitis, I took a quick tour today. I laughed squeaked out loud when I read Dooce's entry.

Peanut you've been nabbed for trespassing...

See anything that doesn't belong on my new glass stovetop?

Pets for the Elderly

I got so excited when I saw this website!!! I hope a shelter in your area is supporting this cause!


PETS FOR THE ELDERLY

All of my froggies died...

This makes me want to buy a gun...

scary sign, originally uploaded by hatamaran.

I mean, what a deal!!!

I saw this sign today and made my husband pull off the road so I could snap a picture of it.

Make of it what you will.

Yes you ARE here to serve me...

Where's my regular food beeeee_yotch?! Atticus is out of his regular food, which means he has to eat the same stuf but with a slightly different texture. Indeed, the world has come to an end.

every once in a while you just want to throw up your hands...

and scream...and scream...and scream. Another rotten weekend. I do not like to have rotten weekends. Yet, I keep having rotten weekends.

Dude, it's bringing me down.

HOWEVER, the blog is starting to look at least palatable. I can view it without clenching my teeth or sweating profusely, so perhaps I'll be grateful for that and stop whining about the other garbage.

I am flanked by cats, so that I, the HUMAN, may not rest my arms on the ARMrest which is made for HUMANS. Yuki and Grayson could not care less. In fact, they are sneering at me as if to say, "Hey, at least we're not helping you type like we usually do...get over yourself lady!"

You gotta love 'em.

Well, it's a start...

I suppose this awful blue thing is a start on rebuilding hatamaran, but it's not quite the same...I suppose it will evolve over time.

In other news, as I was shutting down my computer last night, I noticed police lights flashing outside. An old car was pulled over in the street directly in front of our house and the cops were searching the car for drugs, while they stomped through the edge of our mailbox garden.

Nice. Perfect end to the day. At least no guns were involved.

I think, therefore...oh wait, I didn't think...

Sometimes I do things that are SO stupid that it defies all laws of gravity, interplanetary goo-related molecule-type space dust-stuff and...well...I just totally f*cked up and lost my entire template.

The whole thing. No cached page.

Lesson learned was don't watch late-night basketball, eat an orange, and fend off dogs and cats while doing shit on your computer that is, at least on a hobby-level, quite important.

So here we are in the wee-hours and I at least dredged up some old hideous header that will do until the weekend, when I can *gulp* begin to rebuild this stooooopid thing.

Oh, what I would give for a time machine right now.

Alas, the world does not revolve around the blog.

Maybe it's some sort of lesson.

Under my feet...and in my mind...just breathe...

Recognize this? It's hotel carpet, specifically the one that is covering the floor at a seminar I am attending about practical use of yoga in clinical work. It's really a great seminar so far. Hope your day is filled with good things, too.

Things I have learned despite my best efforts...

That there is no destination except "here."
That you never "get over" loved ones who die.
That chewing your cuticles will give you bad breath.
That worrying changes nothing except the amount of quality time you have.
That forgiveness is about "giving up all hope of a better past."
That sometimes it's better to be wrong.
That if you have the perfect comeback you should probably keep your mouth shut anyway.
That there's nothing wrong with gray hair.
That there's no need to ever buy anything that's not on sale.
That there is no such thing as a comfortable bra or a comfortable thong.
That there's no such thing as black and white, but an infinite range of greys.
That you can take yourself too seriously.

I have no idea why I've suddenly got diarrhea of the blog.
Pardon the mess.

A beginning therapist’s guide to the universe, or “How to run a relaxation group while a patient vomits…”

Granted, I knew becoming a clinical social worker would be challenging—more challenging that writing brochures and thinking up new ways to respond to the following: “I’m not telling you how to do your [marketing] job but look at this brochure I found” (said brochure is always the most expensive piece known to man)…and then, “Yes, can we make it look like that (the very expensive 4-color brochure) and pay $500?” You might as well have said, “…for the same price as drawing with crayons on recycled newspaper?” Or, “Oh, you know, make it creative.” Or, the best, “I just have a few changes” the day before printing.

Then, I moved into the far away and strange world of social work, where you find both the best in humans and the very worst. People stealing from the disabled, people suffering unspeakable tragedies and abuse, but still giving life their best shot, people blowing their life savings during just one bipolar manic phase. You name it. You get the joy. You get the heartache. You see people practically come back from the dead. You see people struggle with things that are unimaginable. You learn some sort of painful (and immeasurably valuable) life lesson just about everyday.

Then there are times that make you incredulous or just make you laugh out loud. I remember when I started this new career I was leading a relaxation group with about 12 people. During the most calming deep breathing part, I hear “heclgh, heclgh, heclgh, bleeeeeehhhhhhhhh!!!!!” I open my eyes to a patient spewing all over the carpet with absolutely no control.

I was surprised to see about half the group was still in a deep relaxation. Several are aghast. One runs from the room hand over mouth. “Uh, just keep breathing…um, don’t worry, just keep your eyes closed and keep breathing (thank goodness it didn’t smell)…we’ll take care of this…”

Well, we moved to another room. It was a little difficult to return to the same level of relaxation. The patient was unaffected by the whole thing.

It has taken me a full year to get to the point I don’t collapse at the end of the day. At first I was completely exhausted and emotionally immobilized after the work day; now I’ve started beginning to practice the survival skill of detaching from work when I go out the door. Patients still creep around in my head, but they don’t keep me awake or distracted during my free time. It’s finally starting to BE free time again.

The main thing I have learned so far is that there is so, so, so much more to learn. Beginner’s mind is useful here.

cilantro plus frost equals algae...

It's 32 degrees as I sit here in my car and I realize my cilantro, which I knew better than to plant this early, will have the consistency of algae blobs when I get home this evening.

now THIS has to stop...

Too many cheeseburgers makes a round girl...

tired of being so dang clean...

Don't you get tired of showering? I do. If I could be a guy, it would be an event rife with utter joy, followed by clean clothes and zipping out the door into the fresh air.

But showers include thorough washing off product from long hair, then proper conditioning. This is followed by the shaving of nearly 50% of the body (daily for me because I am the original Chia Pet...ch-ch-ch-chia) and then the rinse cycle complete with manual smoothness check (I am so sleepy in the morning I often just shave one leg if I don't check).

Then the work begins. Application of base. Application of powder. Application of base shadow. Application of eyeliner. Curling of lashes. Application of mascara. Application of lipstick. Then I spend about 10 minutes frying my hair and still only get about 60% of the mess dry.

Spray hair.

Sigh.

Apply lotion...possibly powder.

Sigh.

Oops, swath pits with deodorant.

Pull sweater over head.

Sigh.

Wipe deodorant streak from sweater.

Grumble.

Change sweaters.

Change pants to match new sweater.

Spray hair again as it is now a flat mess.

Brush teeth.

Sigh.

Change toothpaste covered sweater.

Change pants to match new sweater.

Run from house screaming.

Get to office to rest.

Report from the trenches

(an oldie, but a goodie...)

Excerpts from a Dog's Daily Diary:

8:00 am Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm Wow! Watched TV with my master! Heavenly!
11:00 pm Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary:

Day 683 of my captivity:

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the floor.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. The audacity! There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the
event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released --and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded! The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. The captives have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe....... for now....

Happy Easter!

Wherever you may be, I hope you are filled with chocolate, happy times, and spiritual fulfillment.

check out the frogfest...

Sluggo squeaks through
Originally uploaded by hatamaran

I take pictures of da frogs everyday I am at work. I snap them with my cameraphone and shoot them off to Flickr. They are the best work buddies ever. This is Sluggo.

something every cat lover can understand...

Fog

THE fog comes
on little cat feet.

It sits looking
over harbor and city
on silent haunches
and then moves on.

-Carl Sandburg

I ran across this little gem on someone else's blog the other day (sorry I can't remember who...), and couldn't believe I hadn't read it before. Sometimes it just needs to be as simple as it is.

this one is worth quoting...

"A good marriage is a bit like a pet boa constrictor: either you feed it every day or bad things happen."

Mr. Peepers died...

I am totally bummed out about losing my little frog, Mr. Peepers. I tried everything I knew how to get him healthy again, but alas, he lept into froggy heaven whilst I was away last night.

...the worry people are after me...

JEEZ... I have had a hell of a week and it is only Tuesday...My mother wound up in the ER over the weekend (she is ok now) and all hell broke loose as soon as I walked in on Monday morning... but, so far, I am still alive... and so is everyone else.

The picture is of Guatemalan worry people...tell them your worries, stick them under your pillow and voila! your worries will be taken care of...no wonder they look so disheveled!

the geriatric crew...

Atticus, who is pushing 16 (in front) and Rooney, who is puny little feller, but is hanging in there at 14...

Petey on night vision...uh well at night on a cameraphone...

Petey in absentia...

He was there when I started to take this picture, but alas. he has run off the deck and into the night...

Oh joy...

A change of pace this afternoon...stuck in a CPR class this afternoon...yay, rah...

Poor ole' Rooney...

Poor Rooney isn't feeling well. I have started giving him fluids again and that helps but it might be anothe trip back to the vet...

what, oh what, has happened to my mind?

The only explanation to all this (what you ask?) is that I've lost it.

Blogging.

Suddenly.

Excessively.

Without cause.

And I ain't no rebel.

For some reason, after starting to feel blue around the anniversary of my father's accident, I started making MORE blogs. Because blogs heal wounds...it is the penicillin to my brain cramp. Bring forth the shit, and lots of it, and publish it onto the web...so shall it be, a great gathering of shit, so that you will believe when thou smellest it.

Stinky.

But fun.

Now I have a blog about my FROGS, and my DOGS, my CAUSES, my neglected ART, and my frickin' CAR. I'm letting the cats carry on as usual at Hatamaran for some reason.

I have a disease. DIS-ease. I am not at ease, therefore I must spout like a broken sewer line.

And somehow getting all that shit out makes me feel a little bit better.

Just hold your nose.

Kitchen Khaos...

part two of the kitchen disaster...I love the cabinets so far...

Gherkin has the Monday blues...

herels lookinl at you, frog...

Pooey...

That seems to be my "word of the week." Last week was downright crappy. It was the third anniversary of daddy's accident and it wreaked havoc on my heart and soul all week. It was a week of "trudging through" and I just feel like my mojo has been mo-fo'd.

For the last two weeks nearly every minute I am asleep I am having a nightmare, so I seem to keep putting sleeping off tonight. Unless I've only had a couple of hours or so of sleep, I can do fine the next day.

The last couple of weeks have been prompting me to pull the covers up over my head though. I really dislike the state I'm in, especially with my husband's birthday coming up. It will be a nice one, but I can't put my heart in much of anything right now...maybe it will be better tomorrow...

a nice warm day for whiskerzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Sunny day snoozin'...Atticus purrs as he enjoys the warm sun with Grayson in the background.

poor kitchen...gutted and downright scary

poor little kitchen still awaits its contents...I have gained about 10 pounds eating out...

the dogs have a blog...

the hypnotist...

you are feeling an overwhelming desire to feed me...you are feeling an overwhelming desire to feed me...you are feeling an overwhelming desire to feed me...

decisions decisions...

to scratch or not to scratch...that is the question...

Gherkin celebrates LeapYear by hanging out the window of her abode...

Geese need therapy too...

It looks like the geese want therapy today...this one apparently feels like he needs an individual session. He's been been waiting at the door for quite a while. Lest we forget he is on the waiting list he'll remind us by pecking on the glass from time to time...

Chimney Peeps...

Mr Peepers getting some air...

understanding the facts...

As far as the pit bull situation, I found this informative. It was posted by Chicago's veterinary association in response to their city's attempt to create breed specific legislation.
*******
Frequently asked questions concerning the ban:

1) Are pit bulls really the most likely breed to bite?


The Center for Disease Control has reviewed national bite statistics and concludes from this data, no specific dog can be labeled the most aggressive, therefore statistics used to support breed bans are inappropriate. http://www.cdc.gov/ncipc/duip/biteprevention.htm


2) I want to protect my child no matter what, how can you say that banning pit bulls won’t prevent future attacks?


Because all types of dogs can inflict injury, bans do not diminish violence. The bite statistics of individual cities that have banned pit bulls, such as Winnipeg, which has for 14 years, are not reduced, only changed in breed to German Shepherds and Rottweilers. CVMA wants to see legislation that will protect the public for years to come. http://www.doglegislationcouncilcanada.orgstatistics.html


3) Won’t this help reduce gang-related activities and even spare pit bulls from the abuse they suffer in related pit bull fighting circles?


The population that is responsible for breeding and training the aggressive pit bulls is underground. These criminals will simply go further underground or switch breeds to continue their elicit activity.


4) Why isn’t the simplest solution to all the recent pit bull attacks a breed ban?


Imposing a breed ban is extremely difficult for: 1) Identifying and differentiating from similar breeds/mixes; 2) High cost of support staff to uphold ban; 3) Loss of revenue to city from relocation of families refusing to relinquish pit bulls; 4) Creating an overwhelming burden on local shelters and neighboring cities to handle relinquished pit bulls. Some cities, such as Cincinnati, have even revoked their pit bull bans.


5) What is an alternative solution for breed bans?


Education on socialization, bite prevention, pet selection and pet responsibility are long-term reasonable solutions to enhance public safety. Stronger enforceable non-breed-specific dangerous dog laws, as well as leash laws, are also very important.
http://www.avma.org/pubhlth/dogbite/dogbite.pdf
http://www.avma.org/policies/poldangr.asp
http://www.akc.org/canine_legislation/position_statements.cfm#dangerousdog

Pit Bull Ban Bill Pulled

'nuff said.

hanging in Charlotte today

One of downtown Charlotte's buildings

Back-asswards Pit Bull Laws

Because people simply cannot figure out the basic cause and effect phenomenon, we have two utterly moronic bills flopping around like dying fish in our legislature. The bill would ban pit bull dog ownership, period. Any dog deemed 50% or more pit bull would have to be relinquished by July 2008. And if you keep the dog, it is a misdemeanor.

Links: http://www.legislature.state.tn.us/bills/currentga/BILL/SB3827.pdf and http://www.legislature.state.tn.us/bills/currentga/BILL/HB3984.pdf

Nevermind that the owners are the problem. Nevermind education about responsible ownership. Nevermind enforcing responsible ownership. Let’s punish everyone for the stupid and irresponsible few. Let’s especially punish an entire breed of dog for ignorance in ownership. Let’s pretend dogfighting will be resolved by this. In fact, all the law abiding citizens with well-behaved pits will be relinquishing their animals while the people who are problematic keep theirs in a dingy basement on a chain.

Then what?

Then the stupid and irresponsible few will go out and find other, new dogs to neglect…maybe a German Shepherd, maybe a Doberman. Any dog can be made vicious and/or unstable.

We had a pit mix who was the meekest little dog on earth. We’ve had an aggressive beagle/lab mix we had to take to behavioral counseling because she wouldn’t give up the alpha spot.

I was attacked by two dogs in my life…a St. Bernard who thought I was a stranger in my friend’s house (she only ripped my shirt thanks to fast hands and a sturdy collar) and my piano teacher’s miniature poodle who managed to sink a fang tooth into my thigh. That dog hated me for some reason. I’ll never know why.

Without a doubt there are vicious dogs out there. Without a doubt there are A LOT of stupid, uneducated owners out there. Without a doubt there are pit bulls who are sweet and pit bulls who have a bad attitude. However, I think it is very rare to see an ill-tempered pit with a responsible owner.

Right down the street from me are two pit-mixes (probably more than 50% pit) who are chained up in a backyard. They receive little to no attention, their bowls are often knocked over and they are caked in mud with shabby little houses to sleep in. Tell me whose fault it is if those dogs do not turn out well-adjusted.

Poor Kitchen...

Our kitchen naked... ugh. We just gutted it for a re-do. Oh da pain, but hopefully it will turn out nice.

Meet Mr. Peepers!!!!

One of the two new fellers, Mr. Peepers!!

The Gherkin-a-tor...

Gherkin's new home! You can see her zipping across the top.

frogs and poliwogs...

Our patients' transportation was cancelled today because of the icy morning, so I got to spend some time finishing up treatment notes and paperwork...and set up Gherkin's new, and larger, home. Kick, froggie, kick.

Except, she may have a secret, he may be a she...a frog in drag, a swimmer with swimmers, but hey, I didn't pick a unisex name for nothin'. I'm planning to add about 2-3 more African Dwarf frogs...names in the "hopper" include PJ (Pickle Juice), Irkle, Zirkle, Heebie, Jeebie, Hanky, Panky...there are some more, but I can't remember. I seem to spit them out in deuces.

Apparently being a social worker causes your after-work brain to slowly metamorphize into a pile of loose fecal matter. I'm telling you my brain is poo-poo by the time I get home. But I still enjoy it... I just want some more balance after work. It's slowly coming back but I'd like to recover some neurons stat. I never thought it would take this long!! Back to the ice this morning. Poor Pepper stepped out on the patio this morning to run out into the yard to potty and as soon as she zipped out the door, she zipped right down on her bottom like Bambi her first day on the frozen lake. Rather wary, the doggie was afterward... after she addressed her cadence to "gingerly and gently prancing" she made it back in with all limbs intact.

Petey, in his almighty lazy fashion, held it until the temperature was acceptable for paw contact.

meet Gherkin!

My sweet officemates got me a mini-frog. She's a doll...and her name is Gherkin!

and then she wrote...

not much...
I keep thinking I am going to return to blogging. So MUCH has happened. So MUCH I have not written about. I've learned a different way of life and I am still adjusting. I don't write much in complete sentences anymore because MedyKare hates humans and reimbursing humans (don't expect you to extrapolate that one).

Anyway, I miss blogging. Hell, I miss WRITING. But, that's right at my fingertips, yes? And I will have to get to it...sometime soon.

Sheesh.

CAR MULCH...

the natural way to protect your MINI's floormats... guess I need to clean my car this weekend, huh?

Merry Christmas from Petey too!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas...it has really been a good Christmas. I was unsure a few days ago because I was really missing my dad, but it turned out to be one of the more meaningful and fun Christmases I've had in a while. Here's wishing you and yours the same joy and more...

beagles make bad elves...

ho...ho...ho... from the reluctant beagle-elf.

this is so true...so true...