Where Art Thou, Serotonin?

Is it possible to be intellectually bored to death? Can you reverse the cell maturity process—say, back to age two? I’m so sick of this job that I am hoping to receive far away radio stations in my oldest tooth fillings. Please, anything to create some mental stimulation. I’ve just been here too long. Thirteen years with one company is toooooo long. I am being retarded (as in the verb). Maybe I just have “rigid synapse syndrome.” Could that happen? Petrified electrical impulses? Maybe my serotonin has been replaced by watered-down Five Alive…no, that would be too nutritious…how about day-old Mello Yello or warm malt liquor? Ew.

Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Stay employed. It’s a good thing to be able to pay the bills. Classes start again next month. Stick with the plan…it’ll be okay.