In the key of Be-Flat...

I am in a monotone-soul mood. Must get up, must go to work, must eat, must poop, must distract myself, must sleep...

At the end of this month I'll finally go back to school and start my fieldwork (internship) in social work. Ah, a mere 16 extra hours a week for the next nine months...phah...who's counting.

I am.

Because the only thing that's making me happy right now is painting and the only time I have to paint is when I'm not at work, which is when I will now be working another job that pays nothing by college credits.

Even though I know I have to do it.

Even though it will be great experience.

Even though it is terribly important.

Even though...even though...even though...even though...even though...even though...even though...even though...even though...even though...even though...even though...

I am so tired from being through the ringer for so long. I'm grinding my teeth so hard at night that I have to get a splint and a root canal. We just went through a terrible, terrible health scare with hubby and I thought I was going to come apart at the seams. Fortunately it was a false alarm, but I'm just fucking ragged, man. Ragged.

It will get better. I will be a real person again one day. Gotta run...picking up Rooney from the vet (he's getting more IV fluids today). Gah.