and rising...

Smidget says it's friggin' hot...

peanut

sleepyhead...

good morning Peanut...

but I have fun at work, too...

Gosh I hate to leave out the highlights of my career. Like the other day when I was conducting a relaxation group...everyone eyes closed...breathing deeply...then about 20 minutes into the exercise, I hear a couple of gags and open my eyes to a patient puking freely all over the floor...uh, um, continue breathing...uh...uh...

We moved to another room.

And the other day the cleaning crew had the joy of wiping down a poo-smeared bathroom. Now, I don't know what that was about, but I'm glad I didn't walk in on it.

There's never a dull day, and never a day that doesn't keep you human and very humble.

golly I sure do miss some things...

I really do miss my blog. I no longer write for eloquence or wit, but for speed to meet an insurance deadline. I write about symptoms in sentence fragments, instead of worrying with the musical lilt of the words...which, at first, nearly broke me out in a rash.

But I have learned SO much as a beginning therapist. Although we are still fighting short staffing and program changes, I have really gotten an education on a lot of things...on hope, on the tragedy of cognitive decline, on the perils of insurance bullshit, on learning a new lingo and becoming part of the clinical world, on priorities, on self-care, on dignity, respect, and honor.

There have been days when I really felt like I made a difference in a person's life, which is a heady reward for someone who churned out newsletters and intranet snippet-writing. There have also been suicide prevention contracts to sign, frightening stories, and heartbreaking situations.

All in all, the rapid pace of being immersed in this new profession has my head spinning, and it will take me a while to regain balance again...to be able to leave the patients at the center and not hear them ruminating, asking me questions, and mucking around in my head all evening long. But I've heard that skill of separation simply takes time and experience. It is quite an adventure and one I do not regret.

hmmm...

what's that on your nose?

Well...I decided to go forward with nostril piercing. I asked for the smallest possible piercing. I like it, but it sure did make my eyes water! I've been wanting to do it for a couple of years but couldn't decide...well, that's over with!

blech...

101 flavors of ice cream to AVOID...

Rooney concurs...

that goes for me, too...

whatever...

whatever...so says Atticus...

oh, the frickin' woe of it all...

Wah. Wah. Wah.
I am still in school, taking one last class to get a graduate certificate in gerontology...and the "frickin' woe of it all" has to do with a paper I need to be writing right now.

But I don't wanna.

Like a 5 year old doesn't wanna...

I have been so tired and stressed out over the past two weeks that I don't frickin' wanna do much of anything when I get home. We are under-staffed and reorganizing all in the same breath at the hospital I work at and it is excruciating. Everyone is trying to stay afloat and not kill one another. Our director just left, everyone on staff is fairly new and admissions are flocking in like stuck-together boogers on a stick.

I dare say my marketing job at its busiest was akin to sitting around and picking my nose compared to my job as a therapist at this partial-hospitalization program. I do still love it, but it is fast-paced, extremely emotionally and intellectually demanding, no time to eat or take a piss... I've worked through my lunch everyday since May 25. Come in early and stay late--and be nowhere near caught up on Medicare's evil and mighty stack of required paperwork. Suicidal? Yeah, well prove it with these 15 forms...

Like I said...wah, wah, wah.

I still wouldn't go back though. The rewards of the job are worth the growing pains.

Unfortunately, the blog has suffered mightily, and probably will continue to do so until things smooth out a little more...

I guess I'd better go squeeze that paper out of my ass now. Bleh.

Peanut wishes you a nice, peaceful Sunday...

the better I can smell you with...

Petey would like to smell hi to you all...

So, I did 8 1/2

So, I did 8 1/2 hours of paperwork and 1 1/2 hours of therapy today...see anything wrong with that? Unfortunately, that's pretty typical.

gotta love it...

I felt like this at work today...

silly cat...crates are for dogs...

Yuki takes a power-nap while Petey plays outside...

oh, the trees...

As a new therapist serving older adults, I am single-handedly killing the rainforest. Medicare requires so much documentation that it is a flat-out race to get it done each day. I spend far more time documenting than I do providing treatment.

Now THAT'S crazy.

It's not like you can catch up on it either. You've got a 24 hour window to get it done. Fortunately for the trees, we will be transitioning to an electronic charting system.

What a big change it is to go from the administrative side of life to the clinician side. They really are woefully disconnected from one another. I hardly have time to pee during the day as a social worker/therapist. Everything is time-limited and pressured. There's no time to read the silly newsletter I used to edit. There are 500 other things that come before it...just like what I used to complain about..."why don't they read their newsletter?!" Now I know why. Well, I knew before, but I tried to convince myself that they would somehow find it in their hearts to read the corporate newsletter in order to save my waning ego.

The other big change is that everything is ill-equipped for staff. Ah, the days in marketing were cushy, my friend. You needed supplies...ask and ye shall receive promptly. Welcome to human services... Now I sit in a broken chair, work on an old computer and clunky old inkjet, share an office with another therapist and scrounge for supplies and materials. But I knew it would be that way, because our focus is on the patients who enjoy a homelike atmosphere that is healing and healthy. And the hungry get fed first when there's only so much money to go around, right?

By the way, did I tell you I love my job? (never said that before) Either I'm a masochist, or something real is happening in my life...

and then...

On Friday, something will be conferred to me...no, not cooties or some other dastardly disease of social lubrication...

The Degree.

Yup, that one. The one that says I'm out of the nest. Jiminy Crackheads.

So, apparently I somehow got through the whole thing and will finally get my master's in social work. Maybe even summa cum laude. Not that I've paid attention to such things...

Snarling Purring and waiting around the corner is a new career. I have been offered a full-time job as a geriatriK therapissed. Happy about that...not pissed ;-)

One of the reasons I chose this field is because you will always be challenged to learn more. I just dread the years of being a beginner again. Or maybe if I can be truly mindful, I can be in constant wonder at the knocking of my knees...

talking about school shootings...

There's just nothing you can say about this week's horror. Here are some good articles for those who are looking for guidance in helping themselves or others heal...from the American Psychological Association.

Tips for College and University Students: Managing Your Distress in the Aftermath of the Virginia Tech Shootings

Talking to your children about the recent spate of school shootings

Managing stress after traumatic events

And related...
Violent Video Games Can Increase Aggression

I should note what prompted this post so late after the news of this event...this morning I was sitting in one of my very last university classes before graduation and I kept hearing a "popping" outside...just like a handgun (sounding eerily like the video as well as I have shot handguns before and know what they sound like)...and even though I was 99.9% sure it really was construction, it was very, very unnerving to keep hearing it. It went on for about 10 minutes and finally stopped.

for the love of Pickles...

The most precious little mutt ever, Pickles, our little pup we rescued from a neglectful neighbor nearly 15 years ago was put to sleep yesterday...

Something terrible happened, possibly a brain tumor or a brain bleed. She wasn't able to do anything but pace as if she were blind, unable to recognize us or respond. It was as if she had developed sudden severe dementia. It was really horrible, especially knowing what a sweet spirit she was...never once a bad mood, never once unhappy to see us, never once a complaint...always sweet, always 100% loving. We miss her horribly.

Please go give our little gal a bone on Dogster...

Make your own badge

uncles and things...

One of my dearest uncles died this morning. He became ill rather suddenly. I didn't get to say goodbye, which makes me sad. He was one of the most kind-hearted people I've ever known. Another funeral.

SOLVED...I think.

An International Space Station sighting from 1992...familiar?!

Works for me!

A preferrable explanation...

I would like to find out if this was a space station sighting.

Here's the info from NASA...looks like this could be the culprit, even though it doesn't explain the strange sparkles so far away from the center light.

I saw it again this morning in the same area, so I'm very interested to see if this is it.

convince me it's a star...

and I'll shut up...

Another picture...less explanation...

This is another photo my father-in-law took. It is completely unretouched. Pretty eerie...

I'm not at a computer with graphics software, so I'll post a better crop of it at home. I don't know what it is...

Zero percent more explanation

My father-in-law did take a photo of the object we saw, but as I suspected, without a massive zoom, it doesn't really look like much. You can tell it's not a picture of a star, but it doesn't appear to be anything else either.

So, anyway, all I saw this morning was a star hanging out in the same area...no blinking, hovering or speeding satellite objects.

I am all about finding a rational explanation for this, by the way. I have seen in the early morning bright reflections from airliners traveling into the dawn while it was still dark where I was, but it still doesn't explain all the other stuff. I am pretty relieved that the geometric lights were not real (I think anyway).

I'll probably never know. Weird.

15 percent of an explanation...

So, being the rational sort, I can't stand the fact I don't have an explanation for this phenomenon I experienced this morning.

However,

I did discover that the geometric lights were a trick of the eye. I took the binoculars to several windows and discovered that the window upstairs has a metal screen that separates large points of light into segments. And that explains why my father-in-law didn't see the separate lights like I did (my husband couldn't see separate lights because he can't see crap).

So,

that explains the fancy clothes, but not the rest of it...all the stuff I saw from the basement window with my naked eye--the abnormal sparks, the wavering hover, the bright light that has never been there any other morning...and then, upstairs, the reddish blinking light that traveled upward in a diagonal direction at an exponential speed...

I hope tomorrow's doggie duties yield nothing more exciting than full water and food bowls.

And, I hope I find some way I can explain the other 85 percent. But, I doubt it.

only aliens would be able to keep me from earning my degree...

I was downstairs filling up the dog bowls with water this morning about 6:30 a.m. and I looked out the window. I saw an extremely bright star, even though it was a bit cloudy. "Hmmm, that's really bright," I thought. Then it moved. Just a little...hovering.

We live near an airport, so I didn't think that much of it, but I continued to watch it while I filled the other dog bowl. Then there were "sparks" appearing around it; much like landing lights, but way too far from the center light to be a plane. "What the hell?" I turned the water off and I have to admit, being a skeptical person of those sorts of things, I was quite freaked out. OK, really, really freaked out. I stood there for 10 or 15 minutes watching, expecting to discover it was a plane, but it became more apparent to me that conclusion was quite impossible. It continued to hover and from time to time the "sparks" appeared around it--one near, one or two further away. Again, much, much too far to be part of a set of landing lights. Honestly, I started to pass out after I realized this was something very unusual.

I was afraid if I ran upstairs to tell my sleeping husband it would be gone by then and I would have missed this weird opportunity to observe such a thing, but I finally decided I ought to go up.

I ran to the bedroom window, dog food scoop still in hand, and woke up my husband. It was still there. Still very bright. I got a pair of my dad's birdwatching binoculars to see it better and was shocked at what I saw. It wasn't a blob of light like a star, but an organized set of lights in the shape of a cross or, what seemed to me, lights criss-crossed over the shape of an orb. Faint streams of light emanated from the "thing" and it continued to show the "sparks" from time to time. Unfortunately, all my cameras had dead batteries(though without a serious zoom it probably would have looked like a star on film anyway).

After a while another cross-shaped set of lights, fainter and seemingly farther away, appeared and moved across the sky in a perfect upward diagonal to the left. While moving, the lights showed a more reddish color and blinked/flashed. It left a very faint trail. Alien exhaust emissions!?

As daylight broke it got impossible to see the "whatever-the-hell-it-was" and we went back to bed after checking to see if there were any strange news reports on TV.

I didn't get to use a camera, but I did render in PSP a fairly accurate representation of what I saw, and that's the image in this posting...the lights beyond the bigger "cross" of lights were the intermittent "sparks" and the smaller "cross" is a representation of the location and look of the moving object which only appeared for a moment.

I Gooooogled "UFO March 22, 2007" this morning and I haven't learned of any other people who have seen this, but I, my husband, and his father (who got his telescope out this morning after we called him and saw the reflection of the sun off one of the object's "panels"--he said it looked like a "space station") all saw the same thing and have no way to explain what we viewed. I can't even explain it as a hoax or media stunt...I'm just glad I'm not the only one who saw it, otherwise I would have been dismissed for sure.

Hopefully, no government people in dark suits will show up at my door after this...

My gal...

Today is the one-year anniversary of Sadie’s death. I can’t believe it has been a year. She was a real rascal and an expert at disobedience. She rarely sat still and she frequently lost her temper with our other dog. There were at least three times that we rushed off to the vet to get stitches. We went to a veterinary behaviorist (which is the same rate as a shrink, except without the insurance assistance). I read books. I fretted. I chased her all over the house. She chased me all over the house. We played hide-and-go-seek. She had to be at least one body length ahead of Pickles when we walked. She would distract Pickles by barking at a fake intruder and then steal her treat as soon as Pickles came to see what was going on. She wanted soft toys just to un-stuff them. She wanted hard toys just to bury them (she took great care in burying items). She ran from my big white deaf cat. She hated the garbage men. She hated sirens. She hated thunderstorms. She loved people and kids. She hated dogs. She constantly pestered us when she was inside. She constantly pestered us to come inside when she was outside. She loved to chase birds. She hated to get up in the morning. She hated to go to bed. She’d run upstairs when you told her to go downstairs. She loved to eat more than anything else. She learned that she could only eat the pieces of cat food that had fallen out of the bowl and on the kitchen floor. She cleaned the kitchen floor of all crumbs. She wouldn’t stay out of the garbage. She loved to hear herself bark. The neighbors hated to hear her bark. She loved getting her Christmas toys. Her Christmas toys only lasted 30 minutes. She was a handful. She was always mischievous. Her eyes were always sparkling. She was always smiling like sunshine.

I miss my gal.

it's getting fugly...

Today is the 2nd year anniversary of when we found my father after his accident. I've taken off a couple days to lay low, decrease the stimuli and general overload. I didn't expect the second anniversary to be as painful as the first...

A couple more months and I will have hopefully earned my mastirz in soshul werk...thank God...I thought I would never get there.

My internship in veturinarie soshul werk has been very interesting, but the constant death in this teaching hospital has really worn on me. There are multiple euthanasias nearly every day...it can be terribly difficult for the interns and residents just starting their careers. And I have found out that I would not be able to do this type of work full-time. It is constant grief work and not much else. Yes, you get to see animals all the time and that's really cool, but you also get to see a lot of them die, too.

It could be the anniversary or it could be something else, but I know I want to be able to do more than crisis management and grief work. I do, however, want to be connected to the field as a supportive clinician. Compasshun fatigue is a huge problem in the field and vets see death 5 times more than human doctors. Becoming disconnected and numb is a problem for these folks sometimes, as is burnout.

knit your own penis...

Yes, now you can create the penis of your dreams. And balls, too...need to talk to the boss? Just join another skein and get the cajones you never had.

Atticus says hi...

Atticus says I am feeling better...and I have even gained a little weight!

YUKI

Hi from Yuki

Rooney says hello!

Rooney is where he should not be!

What A Pretty Dog!

And I don't take it back.

A couple of weeks ago I came in to work over the weekend and the building alarm went off. Mind you, it's always malfunctioning and such, so quite frankly, I didn't do anything about it. I didn't have a number to call so I just tried to get my stuff done.

Which is stupid, but sometimes I do stupid things.

I wasn't going to be there long, so my husband came with me. He was wondering around the suite, annoyed that I didn't know who to call. I was in my office and then I heard him call my name, "Uh, Teresa?!"

When I stepped out into the main area of the office, there was the K-9 unit and two policemen with their guns drawn.

Puppy looked hungry. Puppy wanted to eat us.

And the first thing out of my mouth was, "What a pretty dog!"

The cop closest to me looked stunned, as did my husband. But, the smallish German Shepherd dog was beautiful, despite the fact it was pulling so hard the K9 officer had to brace himself to pull him back.

"I guess I shouldn't be happy to see a K9 unit," I said to the officer.

He chuckled a little in a dismayed sort of way and shook his head. "No, you don't..."

So, I proved my identity by pointing to my name on the wall, giving him my license and a business card. All with a smile. All while no one else could figure out why I would take a thing in stride.

I did apologize...a lot. And they told us to have a good night.

I got an angry lecture from my husband and I took it because I deserved it this time. I do not take lectures from anyone unless I've really goofed.

I do know the security code now. By memory. Etched in gray matter.

But the truth is that I really wanted to pet the dog.

The Rodent Department

A ratty mascot for our office...degus from South America...

grayson

Atticus-ker-splaticus

My papaw-kitty, 14 year-old Atticus is not well. Over the past six months he's been losing weight and though his bloodwork looked okay at that time, he's gotten skinnier. The pic is of him before he started to lose weight.

So I took him back and he's in renal failure and has a heart murmur...and has liver problems. I didn't expect to hear any of that and left with two meds, special kidney diet food, IV fluids and a bag of needles to do sub-cutaneous fluids daily.

I really hate poking him on a daily basis. I get through it, but I think it traumatizes me more than it does him. He does seems to feel a little better with the fluids, though. I really hate to lose my Atticus-man. He's a really special, kind of spunky/cranky kind of cat that steals your heart. I don't know how much longer I'll have him, but I'll try to enjoy the time we do have.

Ugh.

I'm going to try to post a little more often...it's a crazy time for me. I have four cell phones between my personal, internship and work equipment...every day is a battle against getting confused as to whether I'm coming or going.

It will all work out somehow. Hope all is well for my friends in the blogosphere!

I'll take 'bloated brains' for $200

Me. no. have. brain. cells. no. more.

Splat.

I hit the windshield again.

Headed all directions, but still traveling the direction of the car.

Fast.

Ah, nothing like retard poetry to get the juices flowing. At the end of the semester I always find myself a bit lost. One more semester. You can do it.

I miss getting to knit. I miss writing. I miss computer noodling and learning new nerdy stuff. I miss having more time to felt, spin, dye, paint and create. And yet, I know things will eventually come together because, even though I'm a blob of crusty, smashed bug guts at the moment, I'm sure the car is headed the right direction. Give it some gas.

I hope to share some puppy pictures over Christmas. Pepper turned out to be a pretty big dog! They are both great and get along fabulously with our little old lady Pickles.

Today at the vet school I got to see a barn owl and a Cooper's Hawk in exotics...pretty cool. And a Macaw was squawking so loudly in one of the treatment rooms that I couldn't hear over the telephone. Funny...they are really, really loud when they're getting poked upon!

I am so scatterbrained these days...I'll be glad when I get my old wrinkled ass out of school...I know, all I do is whine anymore.

Posting has been so sporadic here that I doubt anyone still stops by, but I reckon' I talk to myself a lot anyway! ;-)

neither here nor there...

Does that equal nowhere? Dunno.

I have about five paintings up on Ebay right now and one tiny bid. It looks like everyone is getting some used mulch from the neighbor's yard in their stockings this year...that's all I'll be able to afford. ;-)

If you so choose, click on the Ebay link on the right sidebar --> that-a-way.

Leaving my former profession behind cold turkey has been really hard. I entered into a life of no comfort zones and no safety nets. Doing the art show on top of all that nearly sizzled my last few synapses.

My internship at the vet school has highlighted a lot of my personal weaknesses (oh, I mean learning opportunities) related to being assertive. It's a very chaotic atmosphere with constantly changing schedules and you are swimming in a sea of left-brainers. No, I mean REALLY left-brainers.

When I am fairly confident of what I know, I have a much better time being assertive, but being a brand-spanking-new social worker I find it hard to be as assertive as I need to be. I think some of that is a perfectionism problem--and I need to get over that if I am going to stay in this field. The internship is also very isolating in that you are not allowed to make friends per se. Being that everyone is a potentional client (vets, vet students and owners) you have to maintain a professional distance at all times. I don't have a problem with that, not being the social butterfly sort, but it gets isolating and lonely. I have to be careful to not let that feeling perpetuate into other areas.

And the holidays are tugging at my heart. Last year I was distracted from Daddy's absence by major surgery. This year it's just me, the holidays, and one less family member. Grief can come in waves. Right now I'm caught in the undertow.

Last Thanksgiving I put a piece of pumpkin pie on Daddy's grave. I decided to not do that this year. For some reason it's just too painful this time.

My job working with older people is going fine, but slow. The folks I am working with mostly live alone...and many of them will not have family around during the holidays. You can hear the intense loneliness in their voices when they talk to you about it. If you have an older family member, please take time to include them in some way...even if it's just a phone call to tell them you are thinking about them.

Thanks for the support!

Thanks to everyone who supported my work at Artsclamation!
Here's a slideshow of some of the work that was there if you missed it. :0)

VIEW SLIDE SHOW

One of the funnier, smaller pieces is on Ebay right now. Go check it out. I'm being brave and starting it at $10.

too much is not a good thing...

I need to clone myself. My part-time job is quickly spilling over into a more-than-part-time-experience, my internship requires time outside of internship, my classes are very time-consuming, getting ready for the art show is nerve-wracking, even though I'm painting as fast as I can, Pepper has decided to be scary-dog-aggressive to the neighbor's dog (great.), and I am, quite frankly, losing my mind I'm so overwhelmed with work of various kinds.

It's too bad I don't have any time to talk about some of the neat things going on, like seeing up close a pet raccoon, tiger, lion, feather-plucking macaw, eagle, red-tailed hawk, alpaca, llama, miniature donkey, etc., at the vet school. I missed the leopard (she was in to be spayed). There have been plenty of heartbreaking moments there, too.

But I have to get back to work. Gosh, I wish I had a giant-sized beer.

If you knit...

My sweet hubby sent me this off You Tube. Knitters will LOVE it!



I noticed that on my computer, the video doesn't play past about 2:50...so, if that happens to you, click on the You Tube logo in the lower right-hand corner and you'll be taken to the video on the You Tube site.

honestly, this gives some credence to "LOL"...

and this is cute...

your roots are showing...

What could be more fun than sitting around in the dark hoping to not have a tree land on your house? Saturday was a full day of torrential rains and that night I was working on a small painting when I heard it...crack, crack, crack, crack, whoooooooooosh, thud!--then off went the lights. A huge white oak in our neighbor's yard across the street came hurtling down, blocking the road, taking down all the powerlines on our side of the street and eventually landing in the front yard of the house to our right. Hubby is standing next to the roots of the tree in the pic.

About an hour later, we heard the same sounds again, then car alarms going off. Three houses down another larger oak fell, crushing the end of a house and the three cars parked behind the home. The fire department came and axed down the front door to find that, luckily, no one was there. I'm sure they got a big surprise when they returned!

All night...chainsaws and car alarms and flashing work truck lights. It was like trying to sleep under the "Eat at Joe's" sign. The car alarm was still going off at lunch the next day. Unbelievably, the portion of the tree blocking the road was sawed up and hauled off by the next morning, but we didn't have power until the afternoon.

Fun and games. Fun and games.

be glad (read: drink lots of beer as quickly as possible...)

Having homebase all of the place is a bit of a bitch. Twenty-five passwords, six office and file keys, four email accounts, two databases and three cellphones later, I've got a bit of an ache in my brain and a little cross in my eyes.

So many paths have been beaten...to a pulp.

Which brings me to the Almighty Cure.

Beer.

I plan to drink some. Maybe a lot. But not now because I have class/work/intership/etcetera until 12:30 pm Saturday.

Then I shall partake and pass out in an alley somewhere. Anywhere.

No, wait. I have a paper due at the beginning of next week.

Scratch that (the copious amounts of beer, that is).

I shall moderate the desire with moderation.

Tomorrow is my 10th wedding anniversary. And both of us are too tired to do anything more than plan to pick up heartworm medicine and get a deli sandwich. Make mine a beer sandwich, please.

three little mourners...

Up on Ebay until next Monday...

I painted this a few months ago when the first anniversary of my father's passing was coming up. I think I can let it go now. I don't know if anyone wants a little painting with such a sad theme, but, there you go...

Work has been less than stellar; mainly because I am left to fend for myself with absolutely no direction. I'm self-starter, but jeez... Internship, however, has been quite stellar and I'm learning a lot and have very interesting people to work with...well, except for when I was putting up my frozen entree and found a dead bird in a freezer bag. But, I guess that might be expected given the internship is at the vet school.

My brain stays a little on the tired side going to school full-time and working at a job that is, at best, nebulous. I am trying so hard to keep my mouth shut on this subject.

There are paintings all over my studio in various stages of completion. I think I'm progressing okay in volume, but there are a few pieces I'm not so happy with. What else is new?

I got to meet a Great Dane the other day that weighed more than 160 lbs. He was a beauty...and gentle as a mouse.

I was going to post on Sept. 11, but realized everything I had to say sounded trite or fatalistic, so I just remained thoughtful of the day.

meet little Emily...

Here's
Little Emily, a small 4 x 4 in. painting on Ebay. It will be up for seven days. Meow.

hey mate, the world is a little dingier without ya...

What are the chances that you'd get a stingray bard straight into the heart after wrestling hundreds of deadly gators without losing so much as a finger? He seemed to have a truly kind soul...I, and the world, will miss his endless joie de vivre.

time keeps flying...

I haven't read the news.

I don't know what's going on in the world.

I don't have time to blog.

I haven't adjusted to this new life of new job, new internship and new classes and painting in overdrive in all other waking moments.

I have lots to tell.

I'm too tired to tell.

I haven't adjusted to this new life...

Eventually. Eventually. Eventually.

nutshells in paradise, etc...

Where have I been? Hubby and I took a 10th anniversary trip to Cancun, where I spent approximately 67 percent of the time vomiting and pooping vile substances thanks to food poisoning I got BEFORE leaving the country. However, I did feel good enough to swim with the dolphins (highly recommended!!!) and take a horseback ride on the beach.

I no longer work in marketing. I am a social worker. Weird.

I started my new job with the geriatric outreach program and also my internship with the veterinary social work program. It made for a stressful week...career change, beginning classes and beginning a new internship.

The vet hospital is a maze with every hallway looking exactly the same. At least I can follow my nose to the large animal section (hay and poop!). Within all those halls, interns, residents, vet techs and veterinarians are flitting around like bees in a hive. Better watch those swinging doors...and don't look inside the necropsy (autopsies for critters) room unless you want to see a kitty in several parts like I did today before I headed out of the building...ugh.

Not quite like sitting at a desk all day. My feet hurt and I'm laden with cell phones for both jobs--not to mention my personal one. I hope I can remember to keep them all charged. Sheesh.

I rarely even have time to check email, much less blog. But, I'm guessing I'll find a way to do it...maybe as a bedtime ritual or something.

I also have a Saturday morning class, which sucks, but I can take it from home via the Internet, which is pretty cool. We'll be logging in and viewing a presentation as well as participating via microphone and speakers. It will be interesting to see how the first meeting goes this Saturday.

And that's all the nutshells I can crack for now.

The Garbage Men Cometh!

This is a 10 x 20 acrylic painting called "The Garbage Men Cometh!" I am gathering up paintings for the show in November and this one will be on display at our local paper as a preview to the show. I'm pretty excited about being in a fine arts show.

Sorry the picture is so crappy (especially washed out on the right side), but I just varnished it this morning and they're picking it up this afternoon, so I literally took the photo as I was running out the door.

On a sad-happy-confused-angst-ridden-note, I have four hours left as a marketing professional. Today is my last day. It's been a nice last week though, with many heartfelt good-byes and nice exchanges. I will miss so many people. I didn't realize how attached I was! My good blog buddy, Barry will keep everyone under control. Thanks for everything B! :-)

Blankets R Good, mmmm-K?

Part One:


Part Two:


Part Three:

sigh.

Today was my "farewell" lunch at work. I am so sad to leave my old marketing family, even if I don't want to be in marketing anymore. I got a great card, packed with sweet good luck messages and a surprise gift certificate to my favorite art supply store. :-)

I am in the process of cleaning out my office, which is a real bitch, emotionally and physically. That's the price of being a pack-rat. Wah.

I am leaving for Mexico on Sunday for a 10th anniversary trip and everything is all set--a friend to live at the house and take care of the cats, boarding for the dogs... Great!

I am coming down with a cold. Not so great.

Those last two items need to NOT happen at the same time.

But I'm afraid they are going to. Echinacea and zinc here I come.

My husband just called me and said his car broke down and it has to be towed to the garage ($$$ we don't have).

I broke a crown chewing on ice and had to have it fixed yesterday (more $$$ I don't have).

Life is never dull.

I knew I liked that ole' Carl...

"Humans - who enslave, castrate, experiment on, and fillet other animals - have had an understandable penchant for pretending animals do not feel pain. A sharp distinction between humans and 'animals' is essential if we are to bend them to our will, wear them, eat them - without any disquieting tinges of guilt or regret."

--Carl Sagan & Ann Druyan

what the hell?!!!

Bizarre that I had dream last night my boss had decided to become a nurse practitioner and had to give me rabies shots... This article was brought to my attention through an animal studies list-serv. Nauseating and unnerving to say the least...

By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
Published: August 1, 2006
SHANGHAI, China (AP) -- A county in southwestern China has killed as many as 50,000 dogs in a government campaign ordered after three people died from rabies, official media reported Tuesday.

The five-day massacre in Yunnan province's Mouding county spared only military guard dogs and police canine units, the Shanghai Daily reported, citing local media.

Dogs being walked were taken from their owners and beaten on the spot, the newspaper said. Other killing teams entered villages at night, creating noise to get dogs barking, then honing in and beating them to death.

Owners were offered 63 cents per animal to kill their dogs before the teams were sent in, the report said.

The massacre was widely discussed on the Internet, with both legal scholars and animal rights activists criticizing it as crude and cold-blooded. The World Health Organization said more emphasis needed to be placed on prevention.

''Wiping out the dogs shows these government officials didn't do their jobs right in protecting people from rabies in the first place,'' Legal Daily, a newspaper run by the central government's Politics and Law Committee, said in an editorial in its online edition.

Dr. Francette Dusan, a WHO expert on diseases passed from animals to people, said effective rabies control required coordinated efforts between human and animal health agencies and authorities.

''This has not been pursued adequately to date in China with most control efforts consisting of purely reactive dog culls,'' Dusan said.

The Shanghai Daily said 360 of Mouding county's 200,000 residents suffered dog bites this year. The three rabies victims included a 4-year-old girl, the report said.

''With the aim to keep this horrible disease from people, we decided to kill the dogs,'' Li Haibo, a spokesman for the county government was quoted as saying by the official Xinhua News Agency.

Calls to county government offices rang unanswered on Tuesday.

China has seen a major rise in the number of rabies cases in recent years,
with 2,651 reported deaths from the disease in 2004, the last year for which
data was available, according to the Chinese Center for Disease Control and
Prevention.

Experts have tied the rise in part to an increase in dog ownership,
particularly in rural areas where about 70 percent of households keep dogs.
Only about 3 percent of Chinese dogs are vaccinated against rabies, according
to the center. Access to appropriate treatment is highly limited, especially
in the countryside.

oh deer...

The times I despise most in my life are those times when I balk and get the dreaded deer-in-the-headlights syndrome.

I am a deer.

Maybe I am a tick on a deer.

I need to clean out 17 years of files before I leave this job. What do I do with them? I am such a bad filer, I should probably just throw them all away. It's all on my computer anyway. I am replete with junk as old as 1989, along with about 10 years of photos that need to be sorted.

This transition is causing me far more heartache than I expected. I nearly cried when I said goodbye to the graphic artist who does the newsletter I work on. He's a little man who works for a local printer part-time in semi-retirement and teaches calligraphy on the side. He probably doesn't weigh more than 110 pounds and lost his wife a couple of years ago. I didn't realize how much I would miss his old bony butt. I am going take him a dozen doughnuts one last time in a vain attempt to fatten him up. ;-)

The department I'm going to work in part-time while finishing out my last year of school is pretty volatile in terms of relationships. I will be going from a department that was too toned-down and uptight (but had 0% backstabbing) to one that might be way too high-strung, passive-aggressive and full of conflict. They are having a retreat partly to work out their personal differences. THAT scares me.

And it should.

I feel totally neurotic and am worried about everything. I'm not too good at worrying about the unknown. The anticipatory angst is driving me nuts.

That's the problem with working with one department or having one job for too long. You get worried you can't do anything else, or that leaving the safe place you're in is going to be a huge mistake.

In 10 working days we're going to find out.

Hopefully I won't implode from all the self-imposed pressure.

Poo-fargle and yippity-gargle...

I have been feeling really down lately, so blogging has slowed down. These are the times I wish my blog was anonymous so I could chat about less superficial things, but alas, this blog is only semi-anonymous, so I must be semi-cautious. I don't want get bitten in the ass by my own blog (unless of course it bites me in such a way as to give me a butt-lift to make me look like I did when I was 20 years old).

I miss knitting, but I don't have time to do it anymore. When I do have time after work, study, internship and puppy maintenance, I need to paint for the show in November. Someday I will be out of school and I will only have ONE job. Someday.

Which does bring me to the point that I will be selling a significant portion of my yarn stash on Ebay. There's no reason to keep it around at this point. By the time I get to use it, I won't be interested in all those previous selections.

I shall give proper notice to you knitters out there who might want to partake of such a wooly purge.

For a more interesting post, click here

plastic pants...

I have printed out calendars before, marking off the months, weeks and days before I quit my dead-end marketing job, but now that it's LESS than a month away, I am, as the children like to say, "pooing my pants."

Perhaps my first accident came when I figured out on paper that I would be taking a $29,000 pay cut. Yes, that was a big one; requiring an ongoing change of the undergarments. I would have had to put my plastic play pants on had I decided to go to the pool...

The next stinky accident came to pass because I couldn't transfer on the day I wanted, wreaking all kinds of havoc in my finally-got-this-schedule-squared-away mindset I had finally achieved. No, nothing is easy. I had to massage, finagle, and rebuild all of that--all over again. This morning it is mostly settled thankfully.

More smelly events are in the future, as when I walk out the door on Aug. 11 and effectively end my 18-year marketing career. I won't be an editor in the professional sense anymore. I won't get to play with the company's intranet, or blow ridiculous amounts of film trying to make boring events look exciting.

I won't get to be our online "Dear Abbeee" anymore (I managed an online Q&A for our company). I will really miss that. Before I started that forum I was a stern defender of the stance, "There are NO stupid questions." I was wrong. Dead wrong. Terribly, terribly wrong. There ARE stupid questions. Really, really, really stupid questions. It was fun to read them and even more fun to try to answer them.

I won't get to play with my graphics program anymore to correct all the hideous photographs other marketing folks send me for the company-wide newsletter. But I won't miss that newsletter. Good riddance. I wash my hands of thee...blech. Pooey.

More on all that ongoing crap later. I suddenly ran out of blog-steam.

Biiig Diiiig Regular Shin-dig

In my opinion of course. I have a relative who is a geologist who is quite particular about his job. Several years ago he used to inspect materials and areas where major construction was to occur. If he identified substandard concrete or other materials he reported them to his company. Unfortunately those warnings were usually ignored and actually got him labeled as a "trouble-maker."

He reported it because it was IMPORTANT.

I'm sure this wasn't exactly the same situation, but this kind of slop goes on all the time. Some of the things he told me really made me mad...that the stuff they were using wouldn't stand up to pressure, etc. But HE was a "trouble-maker."

Why doesn't it matter until someone dies, or even more feared by them, sues.

Which brings me to another sore spot...

...The slow death of small business thanks to white-collar thieves. When I am late on a payment for something, I get a call from some slob in upper New York with personal anger management issues. And I find a way to get caught up. When a small business provides a service and the client doesn't pay on time, they get a call from the company. And then they ignore it. And then they NEVER PAY.

This is otherwise known as stealing.

And it happens all the time at my husband's company. They purchase services. They receive the services. They don't pay--for months and sometimes not at all.

Why? Because they know a small business won't have the money to sue.

Personally, I think these fuckers need to go to jail. It's one of the reasons why we struggled so hard financially while hubby was in training. In a 100 percent commission job, you have to get paid to eat. And they weren't paying. Fortunately, there are some other clients in the mix right now that get the cash flow going.

And that's what I'm worried about as I look "forward" to going part-time next month. A couple more good paychecks and my income drops by about 60 percent and my benefit cost triples (part-timers get screwed on benefits at our company). So, small-business-thieves can make our lives miserable.

Pay small businesses on-time, please! (Or I'll strangle you with yarn from my obscenely large stash that just-sits-there-because-I-don't-have-time-to-knit-anymore.)

But that's another post.

the dumbest neighbor EVER...

That would be me.

We've been working with our dogs on socialization and leash-walking lately, so while my husband was working out a couple of nights ago I took each dog around the block separately. First Petey and I made the trek and then I came back and got Pepper, who is the dog we most need to socialize because of her shyness.

So.

So, I'm walking around the block and my neighbor comes out with his girlfriend and their three fairly large dogs. Pepper gets a little bent out of shape over the excited dogs, but not too bad. We say "hi" and then he asks me if I am a "professional dog-walker" now.

This is where I get stupid. No, make that stoopid.

I say, "No, I'm your neighbor." I point at my house and add, "I live right there."

No shit.

Apparently Pepper ate my brains and shat them out on the backside of the city block. Because they weren't with me with I said that.

They took pity on me and didn't laugh out loud or let their jaws drop open...at least not right then, because perhaps they knew my rancid brains were around the corner steaming in the Tennessee humidity.

A few steps later and after thinking, well, I have lived here 10 years, I came to the high-powered conclusion that he probably DID RECOGNIZE ME AFTER ALL. And, just perhaps, he was utilizing that humor thing. Just PERHAPS.

I thought I heard Pepper whine, "duh, really?"

But it's too late. It's all gone down in the annals of unexplainable, STOOPID behavior. I probably elicited a block-long conversation on the finer points of being STOOPID.

STOOPID NEIGHBOR.

Dat's me. Somebody get me the pooper scooper. I'm going back to get my brains.

mowing down the pounds...

Too bad THIS GUY doesn't live in my neighborhood. I would have been the first taker.

You disgust me...

All you people who park in handcapped designated spots because you are LAZY and SELFISH.

I went to the grocery store at lunch to pick up some goodies and when I drove in I stopped for two ladies to cross from the door into the parking lot. One lady had a grocery cart totally full of items. She pushed her cart on to her car somewhere in the bowels of the lot. The other lady had nothing, was jabbering on a cell phone, casually walked in front of me and got into a van in the very first handicapped spot in front of the door. Then she just sat there yacking on the phone. No hangtag, no plate, no anything--just a big beeyotch with an over-sprayed blonde bob and a cellphone jammed in her ear. I tried to give her a dirty look as I parked and walked into the store, but she was so absorbed in her conversation and rearranging the contents of her purse that she was oblivious to all that was around her.

She was well-dressed, in her late 40's and didn't limp, cough, or lurch. In fact she seemed extremely relaxed and not in a hurry at all.

I see so many really old and slightly handicapped people purposely NOT park in these spaces because they want to give those spaces to people who have wheelchairs or crutches--and because they want to function as normally as possible.

I suppose not having a brain or a heart would be considered a handicap...

Dear Mystery Philanthropist,

First, thank you for getting this far into the letter. I would like to ask for a few things that would make my life sooooo much easier. Yes, they are rather mundane and ordinary, but gosh, if you are throwing money into the fireplace for fun, well, please reconsider and buy me the following items:

A cleaning person, because...I relapse into major depression when I look at how much hair and dirt is produced by two slobbering puppies who ingest large items of furniture and constantly wrestle; thereby coating everything within a 10-foot radius with skidmarks, hair, eye boogers and drool; a 14 year-old cat who won't stay out of the garbage, steals dog food and chews through plastic bread, cracker and coffee bags; a 13 year-old cat whose periodontal disease causes a constant drip of vicious-smelling spit; a 12 year-old cat who has recently decided to lose control of his bowels for no medically discernable reason; and two 2 year-old cats who attack one another atop the armoire, sending hair clods into the air like furry scud missles falling to Earth. And dear God, bless little Pickles, our 14 year-old dog, who mostly sleeps and couldn't care less about making a mess of anything.

A new mailbox (pictured for your viewing pleasure), because...some asshole keeps hitting a homer on ours. Sometime last night the entire top half and door underwent a decapitation process. (I wonder what the mailman will do with our mail today? I can't believe he just laid it in there!)

A real garage, because...ours is a giant storage closet. And being built in 1930, the doors are hardly automatic as well being just wide enough for a Model T.

One year's salary, because...I would just like to go to school and fulfill my internship for my last year.

New throw rugs, because...the 12-year old cat ruined my favorite two rugs, not to mention the hardwood floor underneath (throw in hardwood floor refinishing, also, please).

Someone to come in and wash all of my underwear, because...the pair I have on today has a big hole in them.

That should do it for today. Tomorrow I'll probably have more items for you. This week would be good. Have your people call my...uh...me.

watch out for dangerous port-a-potties...

I don't do the limbo very well...

It's not that I'm not flexible. For a 41 year-old, I dare say I am quite flexible, but I ain't talking about dancin'. Way too many things are up in the air for me right now.

One thing that did land squarely on the ground was my internship for next year. I did get the veterinary social work position I was wanting so much. I am very excited about that. I will work there three days a week fall and spring semesters. It's a large university vet clinic so I'll see everything from puppies to alpacas and tigers. There are lots of components to the program, including the obvious counseling for folks who have a tough time with the grief process. It's a very unique opportunity that will probably never come my way again.

I'll also be in class and work 20 more hours part-time (I hope). Our company's benefits are three times more costly when you go part-time, so I will basically be working to provide benefits. That sucks. Hubby is 100 percent commission, so I'm just praying for promptly paying customers. I'll be playing the part of "Guido with the baseball bat" if they don't!

I deal with change okay, but not necessarily instability plus change. Ever since Daddy died I seem to be oversensitive to stress of any kind, which has really frustrated me. I've been moving at a snail's pace ever since.

I am finally starting to paint again, thank God. I couldn't get into the studio until I put some of Daddy's things away in a closet. Now it doesn't hurt so much to go in there. I need to build an inventory of about 40 paintings for a show in November, so I need to get going! I'm still going to have some smaller "warm-ups" for Ebay soon, but for the most part I'll be saving all my work for November. After the show I'll have a bunch up on Ebay (well, hopefully not as many as I took to the show!). I've not been really pleased with the "warm-ups," but part of it is a negative attitude I think. I have a hard time believing I deserve to be in this show, but I reckon' I need to get over that and get busy!

Hope your Monday goes like a Friday today!

ants in his pants, or...

Go see MATT, courtesy of Barry

so much for that...

So much for getting out and having fun. So much for bringing in the pups to work. So much for...hoark...we interrupted that message for a stomach virus. A really, really ugly one...a porcelain-hugging one. And I don't do porcelain-hugging unless forced against my will. 'Nuff said.

Now I'll be stuck with working on Sunday to meet Monday's deadlines. Yippee. Not to mention doing about eight hours of studying for class. Actually, five or six of those hours have been done thankfully, but I still have a chapter and four essay questions to write up. Bleh.

I'm using vacation time at work to cover the rest of my internship hours, which sucks, but I have a finite amount of energy at the moment. Work is sad, unproductive and stressful right now. I worry about going part-time and I worry that the part-time job I'm waiting for won't be approved and I'll be screwed. More importantly, someone I've worked with for many years is about to lose a parent to illness and the office has become a place of unrest, tears and frustration. I feel for this person who isn't sleeping at all, and who is still trying to fulfill many obligations that, in my opinion, just oughta wait. I really felt bad for missing a day of work when this person could have used my help. I worked as much as I could from home, but I know it would have been better if I had been there. Nothin' I can do about it now.

A couple of months ago I asked my mom, "When does it stop feeling like it was just yesterday?"

She said, "a really long time."

are you bringing your pup?

Tomorrow is national Take Your Dog to Work Day

Now, you don't even have to tempt me. It's just that I need to pick who to bring.

Petey, who is more manageable because he's small...

or

Pepper, who needs socialization.

Pickles, our 14 year-old, would not be interested in the whole soiree for more than 35.2 seconds, so I'm going to let her get her rest on what is left of the couch (if you missed that post, Pepper ate the couch).

Of course Petey did try to pee on a stack of dog food bags at Pet Supplize Pluz, but I yanked him away before the stream hit the sack...so-to-speak. I had to tell the cashier she had "a clean-up on aisle seven."

Then, Pepper has decided she needs to drag us for walks. We have since tried the "Gentul Leadur"...and, let me just say, it works IMMEDIATELY. Pepper was practically digging up concrete and now she walks with a LOOSE LEASH after ONE WALK. So, if you have a persistent puller, get one of these things...they're worth every penny.

Tonight, I'm off to my first MINI meeting with the Smoky Mountain MINI Club and then it's off to hear Rhett Miller play at Sundown in the City. It should be a fun night. :-)

Toodles, all...and don't forget to contact your legislator about voting for HR 503--the bill that would end horse slaughter in this country.

House of Representatives to Vote on a Permanent End to Horse Slaughter

[from SAPL...]

House of Representatives to Vote on a Permanent End to Horse Slaughter!
The American public must be heard like never before!

June 22, 2006


Dear Humanitarian:

Since the Society for Animal Protective Legislations national campaign against horse slaughter began in 2001, our ultimate goal has been passage of a permanent horse slaughter ban. We have just learned House of Representatives Leadership has assured the sponsors of the American Horse Slaughter Prevention Act that a vote on the measure will take place on the House floor before June 30.

Sponsored in the House by Congressional Horse Caucus Co-chair John Sweeney (R-NY), Representative John Spratt, Jr. (D-SC) and Representative Ed Whitfield (R-KY), the Act will end the slaughter of horses for human consumption and the domestic and international transport of live horses or horseflesh for the same purpose. Just last year, over 90,000 horses were slaughtered in the three foreign-owned horse slaughter facilities located in Texas and Illinois.

We have always believed that, if given a fair chance and an open vote, Congress would support this complete ban. Four separate times, it has demonstrated interest in stopping horse slaughter for wild and domestic horses by voting in favor of amendments. The upcoming vote is crucial, and it represents a culmination of five years of hard work by supporters from across the United States. It is vital for everyone you know to call their Representative immediately and urge a YES vote for the Act.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Please call or fax your Representative TODAY, asking him or her to vote in favor of H.R. 503, the American Horse Slaughter Prevention Act. Keep checking your email every day for the latest news, and continue to contact your Representative until the vote has transpired.

When talking with your Representative's office please include some of the additional facts about horse slaughter listed below.

To locate your Representatives contact information and to learn more about horse slaughter and the American Horse Slaughter Prevention Act please visit www.saplonline.org/horses.htm.

Please share our Dear Humanitarian eAlert with family, friends and co-workers, and encourage them to call or fax their Members of Congress, too. Thank you very much for your help!

Sincerely,
Cathy Liss
Legislative Director

Sign up for SAPL eAlerts to receive the latest legislative news on what you can do to help us protect all animals. http://www.saplonline.org/action.htm

---

FACTS AND FAQ's ABOUT HORSE SLAUGHTER
Last year three foreign-owned slaughter plants cruelly slaughtered more than 90,000 horses for human consumption in Europe and Asia. Tens of thousands more of America's horses were exported from the U.S. and slaughtered in other countries.
Slaughter is NOT humane euthanasia. Horses suffer horribly on the way to and during slaughter.

Passage of the American Horse Slaughter Prevention Act (AHSPA) will reduce animal suffering ­ hence its wide support throughout the equestrian and veterinary world, as well as the humane community.

Americans overwhelmingly support an end to horse slaughter for human consumption (polls from Kentucky, Virginia, Texas and Utah respectively show that 82, 74, 72 and 69 percent of those questioned oppose the practice). In California, a 1998 ballot initiative (Prop. 6) banning horse slaughter for human consumption passed with 60 percent of the vote.

Sick and old horses to slaughter

Question: Is it true that slaughter is only a last resort for infirm, dangerous or no longer serviceable horses?

Answer: 92.3 percent of horses arriving at slaughter plants in this country are in "good" condition, according to the US Department of Agriculture's Guidelines for Handling and Transporting Equines to Slaughter.

Neglect and abuse

Question: Will horse abuse and neglect cases rise significantly following a ban on slaughter?

Answer: There has been no documented rise in abuse and neglect cases in California since the state banned horse slaughter for human consumption in 1998. There was no documented rise in Illinois following closure of the state's only horse slaughter plant in 2002 and its reopening in 2004.

Cost of caring for unwanted horses

Question: If there is a ban on horse slaughter, will horse rescue and retirement groups have the resources to take care of unwanted horses? Should the government have to pay for the care of horses voluntarily given up by their owners?

Answer: Not every horse currently going to slaughter will need to be absorbed into the rescue community many will be sold to a new owner, others will be kept longer and a licensed veterinarian will humanely euthanize some. Opponents of this legislation admit passage of the bill will not necessarily lead to an increase in the number of horses sent to rescue facilities, precisely because humane euthanasia is so widely used. It is not the government's responsibility to provide for the care of horses voluntarily given up by their owners, as these animals are private property. Hundreds of horse rescue organizations operate around the country, and additional facilities are being established (a list is available).

A safe and humane solution for sick, old and unwanted horses

Question: If slaughter is not an option, what will we do with sick, old and unwanted horses?

Answer: Approximately 900,000 horses die annually in this country (10 percent of an estimated population of 9 million) and the vast majority are not slaughtered, but euthanized and rendered or buried without any negative environmental impact instead. Humane euthanasia and carcass disposal is highly affordable and widely available. The average cost of having a horse humanely euthanized and safely disposing of the animal's carcass is approximately $225, while the average monthly cost of keeping a horse is approximately $200.

Export of horses for slaughter abroad

Question: If there is a ban on horse slaughter in the United States, will there be an increase in the export of horses for foreign slaughter? Will horses suffer from longer transport for slaughter in countries where there may be weaker welfare laws?

Answer: Horse slaughter has declined dramatically in the United States over the past decade, but there has been no correlating increase in the number of American horses exported for slaughter abroad. Further, the AHSPA prohibits the export of horses for slaughter abroad, and contains clear enforcement and penalty provisions to prevent this from happening. Risk of federal prosecution and the high costs associated with illegally transporting horses long distances for slaughter abroad are strong deterrents.

Standards of care at sanctuaries and rescue organizations

Question: Is it true no standards exist for horse rescue facilities that take unwanted horses?

Answer: The Doris Day Animal League and the Animal Welfare Institute published "Basic Guidelines for Operating an Equine Rescue or Retirement Facility" in 2004. Additionally, the Association of Sanctuaries and the American Sanctuaries Association provide accreditation programs, a code of ethics and guidelines for the operation of sanctuaries and rescue organizations. Horse rescue groups must also provide for the welfare of horses in their custody in compliance with state and local animal welfare laws.

Use of horsemeat in pet food

Question: If there is a ban on horse slaughter, will horsemeat no longer be available for pet food?

Answer: There is no horsemeat in pet food. This practice stopped decades ago and has some connection to the enactment of protections for America's wild horses in 1971. The US public and Congress were outraged to learn federal agencies were rounding up and allowing the exploitation and slaughter of these national treasures for items such as pet food. Some by-products of the horse slaughter industry are used in various consumer items, but they are derived from the rendering (a different process than slaughter and not affected by the AHSPA) of dead horses and other animals.

countdown to chaos...

It's a mere two months until I leave a communications career of 17 years. I had hoped to stay on part-time while I finished school, but they wouldn't arrange it for me...which, well...I'll be nice.

So, I'm about to leave a group of people, some with whom I've worked since 1989.

Nineteen-eighty-nine...When I had big hair and wore skirts so short it made my boss nervous. I was a freakin' kid. In a company that's grown to nearly 8,500 employees, there have been many departments and companies to provide change, and I've held many jobs while I've been here, albeit all in marketing/pr/communications.

I actually used my degree.

Fancy that.

Now I'm 2 1/2 semesters away from getting another degree that will launch another career. I wonder if I'll work at the same place for 17 more years? Who knows? I seem to be one of those people who grow roots wherever they land. That's good. That's bad.

Every once in a while I think of leaving this relatively safe job and I get a jolt of electricity in the old solar plexus - the reeling sort of feeling you get when you realize that, yes, you did in fact miss that nail with the hammer, and yes, you just smashed your finger into its fascimile three times the original size.

Objects are (much) closer than they appear.

It's sneaking up on me and I'm starting to miss people. People I've really enjoyed working with are actually sad. Hell, I didn't even know you liked me! I guess a few people do. They must not have been faking it.

I worry about writing and editing - and stuff. Will I suddenly become illiterate when I leave this field where I work and play with words all day? Will I forget all the proofreader's marks? Will I actually attend the Writer's Guild I just joined so I can stay involved with my "writing side?" Or maybe I'll start using sentence fragments a lot? Or maybe all the time. Or maybe in addition to forgetting that "alot" is really two words. Oh, the worry, the angst, the adjectives of it all!

Will I forget how to code simple webpages? I work with our intranet everyday; soon, not at all. Will I never close a tag again? Will I become isolated in a big ocean of non-gadgety information and never live up to my dream of being a wanna-be nerd?

I didn't expect to be scared. I didn't expect to grieve the end of this career that has been on my nerves for so long. I didn't expect to whine this much.

(I didn't expect anyone to read this!)

hey, our humane society has balls...

or rather they're trying to get rid of them.

This June, lop 'em off. Click the logo to see the flier. My dad would have surely snickered at such a thing. Sure ain't no fun having Father's Day without him. Miss you, Pop.

is it just me, or...?

Every time I log into Yah00! mail it drives me crazy that there's a picture and heading that are completely incongruent.

For instance, there will be a picture of a crazy (and I do mean crazy) old guy screaming his brains out in a tent, and the cutline reads...

"Find an old flame"

Um, maybe you're better off if you don't. This dude has issues! He's screaming at someone...in a tent no less.

Or today, there's two chicks in their early 20's running from the incoming surf, and the cutline reads...

"You deserve the best."

I'll let you come to your own conclusions; there are several.

Granted, a few are relevant, but some of them just have me cocking my head to the side like a beagle.

It all started with the crazy guy in the tent. That's the one that gets me.

gimme some monkey lip...

One of the funnier things I've gotten lately from my husband--Monk-e-mail.

today's quiz!

Closely study the picture below.

Now, is this a picture of:

a) a crack house (minus the addicts)
b) an attempt to find out how a couch is constructed
c) the result of boozed up lunatic with a chainsaw
d) the result of two puppies, who in three weeks destroyed a nice couch that used to be in our living room

Hmm...thinking...thinking...thinking...

Ding! Ding! Ding! Even though I am fascinated with the construction of the couch (b), if you answered "d," you are correct!

We used to have this couch in our living room. When we got some new furniture a couple of years ago, we put our old couch in the cellar where our laundry room is (I know it looks haunted down there--a la old house charm). Sadie and Pickles always had cool water, perfect 70 degree temps. year-round and a nice new couch to nap on while we were gone. There's also a doggie door that goes into a fenced in area outside.

Now, in less than a month, Pepper, and to a lesser extent Petey, have completely...well... eaten that same couch.

More pictures of the destruction. Click for BIG.


Like I always say, "Oh well..."

mostly Pepper...with her toys...

a few historical points...

What do you think of this presentation?

A friend of mine, who is also an avid historian, sent this to me.

let's play...

A very poor quality video I took with my digital camera...the puppies are GROWING!

Petey and Pepper playing What's YOURS is MINE...and what's MINE...IS MINE, TOO!

people who have more disposable income than moi...

Way too cute. A lot of you have probably already seen it, but if not you'll enjoy (just try to not cringe at the potential waste of dollars)...

the real scoop on the origin of dogs...

(If you've seen it before, well, sorry 'bout that...)

HOW DOGS CAME TO BE: Where do pets come from?

A newly discovered chapter in the Book of Genesis has provided the answer to "Where do pets come from?"

Adam and Eve said, "Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us."

And God said, I will create a companion for you that will be with you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves."

And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve.

And it was a good animal.

And God was pleased.

And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve and he wagged his tail.

And Adam said, "Lord, I have already named all the animals in the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal."

And God said, "I have created this new animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name, and you will call him DOG."

And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to them and loved them.

And they were comforted.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was content and wagged his tail.

After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said, "Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks and they believe they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps too well."

And God said, I will create for them a companion who will be with them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy of adoration."

And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.

And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Eve gazed into Cat's eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme beings.

And Adam and Eve learned humility.

And they were greatly improved.

And God was pleased.

And Dog was happy.

And Cat didn't give a shit one way or the other.

National Kitty Pimping Day...

Okay, so I made that up, but I am pimping a kitty named Aldo. If you're in the area and you're looking for an adorable tuxedo-sort-of-guy, Aldo's your man. Aldo belongs to a friend of mine who took in a pregnant kitty and voila! kittens. (You do know to spay and neuter your animals, yes!?)

Anyway, now that Aldo is here, he needs some lovin' as my friend can't keep all the babies. If you're a kitty-parent-in-waiting, give me a shout at I_want_to_vacuum_more@hairball.com

Okay, so that's fake, too, but the link opens up to the right address.

What do you expect from a freakin' pimp?!

every once in a while...

you have to revisit Dooce. I really loved this post on her Alpha Mom site. Thanks to Britney at Nashville is Talking for pointing it out.

On another animal-relationship-sort-of-note, I'm interviewing for next year's social work intern placement at University of Tennessee's vet school. They have one of the country's few formal veterinary social work programs. I've been wanting the internship ever since its formation a few years ago, and now I'm eligible for it.

I'll share more about it later once I have the interview. :-) Woof, wish me luck.

trouser chili...

The words alone make it funny...my recent favorite My Cat Hates You posting.

I send in my cats' photos, but the bastard never gives me the honor of a caption. Hey, mister, MY cats hate YOU! Um, so there.

Trouser chili, heh.

Smidget to the Rescue!

Smidget and I (and my mom) went on a cat rescue adventure June 4. We were part of a seven-cat rescue relay to Atlanta...all Persians! They are all stretched out, cleaned up and getting ready for new homes now! Smidget can put a lot of booty in her boot if she needs to! Oh, and the above pic was taken on the way home with the exposure set at 10 sec...warp speed!

this GERDle is too tight for me...

Welcome to the GERD-le of mid-life, tightly laced with purple pills and the squeeze of "ha-ha-you-just-thought-I-was-a-heart-attack" esophageal spasms.

Hilarity at its best. Comedy Channel funny.

I have arrived, hand on the wheel and pill-in-hand, flux-capacitor over-fluxing; speeding down the super-highway of antacid-altered reality.

Maybe that's what the eggs were trying to tell me.

Leaving a career of nearly 20 years and looking at cutting my salary by 75 percent over the next year while I finish school has gotten me GERD-ishly green.

Saturday night after dinner I started having significant chest discomfort and nausea. By the guidelines, fodder for the emergency room.

Except I had recently had my heart checked, cathed, EP'd, everything-you-can-thing-of-grammed.

So I didn't go, but I wasn't having any fun in the meantime.

The next day I put new flowers on my father's grave to replace the old, faded ones. A year-and-a-half and still no grass will grow on his grave.

I said, "Maybe he wasn't ready to go."

Later that night, my chest discomfort turned into double-you-over-Sanford-and-Son chest pain--spasms that had me clutching my chest just like the old man.

Still, I did not go, but I did get a quick EKG screening from a healthcare friend. No abnormalities.

Instead of taking it easy that night, I ate hot spicy Thai food from my favorite restaurant.

Drunken Noodle, spicy 3/5, please; coconut soup, no meat and Diet Coke

It went down like razor blades. The true test of GERD. I ate every bite anyway--it was so good. I didn't care. I wasn't having a heart attack (I knew I wasn't, but confirmation is GERD when you need it).

Still no grass on his grave and maybe I wasn't ready for him to go. I had a hard time getting the flowers there. I had a hard time ordering them. I had a hard time deciding what day to take them. I had a hard time driving up there to place them. I had a hard time controlling the urge to dig him up and ask him why, why now, that we were close for the very first time, why did you leave? Why did you leave just when I was on the verge of having the thing I longed for my whole life? To be close to my own father; to know he was finally proud; to know he thought I was really a good person.

I can take a purple pill for the GERD, but it's going to take the slow, watered-down medicine of Time for the broken heart.