you've got mail...

sorry if you've read it before...but I laughed out loud when I got this email from my friend Susan.

My name is Billy Evans. I AM A very sick little boy.
My mother is typing this for me, because I can't. She Is crying. The
reason she is so sad is because I'm so Sick. I was Born without A
body. It doesn't hurt, Except when I try to breathe.

The doctors gave me an artificial body. It is A burlap Bag filled
with leaves. The doctors said that was the Best they could do ON
account of us having No money OR Insurance.

I would like to have A body transplant, but we need More money. Mommy
doesn't work because she said nobody Hires crying people. I said, "
Don't cry, Mommy and " and She hugged my burlap bag. Mommy always
gives me hugs, Even though she's allergic to burlap and it makes her
Sneeze and chafes her real bad.

I hope you will help me. You can help me if you Forward this email to
everyone you know. Forward it to People you don't know, the too. Dr.
Johansen said that for Every person you forward this email to, Bill
Gates Will team up with AOL and send A nickel to NASA. With That
funding, NASA will collect prayers from school Children all over
America and have the astronauts take Them up into space so that the
angels can hear them Better.

Then they will come back to earth and go to the Pope, And he will
take up A collection IN church and send All the money to the doctors.
The doctors could help Me get better then. Maybe one day I will be
able to Play baseball. Right now I can only be third base.

Every time you forward this letter, the astronauts can Take more
prayers to the angels and my dream will be Closer to coming true.
Please help me. Mommy is so Sad and and I want A body. I don't want
my leaves to rot Before I turn 10

If you don't forward this email, that's okay. Mommy Says you're A
mean and heartless bastard who doesn't Care about A poor little boy
with only A head. She Says that if you don't stew IN the raw pit of
your own Guilt-ridden stomach, she hopes you die A long slow,
Horrible death and then burn forever IN hell.

What kind of cruel person are you that you can't take Five freakin'
minutes to forward this to all your Friends so that they can feel
guilt and shame about Ignoring A poor, bodiless nine-year-old boy?
Please Help me.

I try to be happy, but it's hard. I wish I had A Kitty. I wish I
could hold A kitty. I wish I could Hold A kitty that wouldn't chew ON
me and try to bury Its turds IN the leaves of my burlap body. I wish
that Very much.

Thank You,

Billy " Smiles " Evans